A few months ago I published my first blog post of 2019 which felt a little crazy considering it was May 1st (seriously, where did the last 7 months go?!) In that post, I promised you a little life update and explanation of where I’ve been.
It’s been a crazy year so far, we had a big transition at work and adjusting to the new leadership and my new role has been a challenge, a great one, but a time consuming one. 
Dress (Ted Baker, sold out but similar here.)
Jumpsuit (red is sold out but obsessed with this white one, such a fun rehearsal dinner, bachelorette party or bridal shower look!)
Rehearsal dinner in a Bass Pro Shops was a new one for us but so fun!
We’ve also had a busy first few months when it comes to travel. It is officially wedding season in my life, it seems like every time I turn around I’m adding a new wedding, bachelorette, or bridal shower to my calendar. It’s so fun, especially when the event is a destination for us and an excuse to get away from D.C.! We had three “destination for us” weddings in California, Boston and Memphis, then had our biggest trip of the year in late June and early July. We headed to Finland with my family for my host sisters wedding and I was able to see my entire host family and so many of my friends from my year abroad in high school. It was truly incredible.
Striped top / purse / sunglasses (similar)
My dress is sold out but similar here.
After Finland, we headed to London (where James and I both studied abroad in college) for a couple of days with a couple of close friends. As most of you have probably seen on Instagram, James completely surprised me and proposed! More on that later, but for now I’ll share that we are so excited to start planning our 2020 wedding and can’t wait to share the process with you!
Dress / Shoes
But the biggest reason I’ve been so MIA is a little more personal and something I wasn’t sure I wanted to share. This spring, while I was at work one day I noticed that my tongue was completely numb, I didn’t think much of it because allergy season was in full swing but by the end of the day I noticed the entire left side of my face was paralyzed. I went straight to the emergency room thinking I was having a stroke, thankfully it wasn’t that or anything nearly that serious. We were in the ER for 19 hours and during that time my face gradually became more paralyzed, we realized I couldn’t close my left eye and when I tried to smile, and I mean really tried, only the right side of my face would cooperate. It was a scary night, but after all the tests they finally diagnosed me with Bell’s Palsy.
Since I had no idea what it was and it seems like most people haven’t heard of it unless a family member of theirs has had it, I’ll sum it up. Basically it’s a virus that impacts the nerve that controls the muscles on the side of your face. It’s scary because at first it can present as a stroke and there’s really nothing you can do except rest and let it run its course, which could last anywhere from 3 months to years.
I’m lucky, my paralysis has healed about 90% depending on the day (when I’m tired the paralysis seems to get worse). I can close my eye almost all the way which means I finally got to ditch the eyepatch and I can finally eat and drink normally, it’s the little things, guys! But it has still been a difficult time, the pain and exhaustion have been pretty intense, and being out of work for 6 weeks was HARD. The recovery requires a lot of rest, and my body is forcing me to cooperate, I’m often exhausted after only 3-4 hours of being active in anyway so a lot has taken a back seat these past months while I have focused on recovering and getting healthy again.
In addition to the exhaustion and pain, having half your face paralyzed took a pretty big toll on my self esteem, especially when part of your job requires being in front of a camera. Some days it was hard to even brush my teeth because I hated looking in the mirror. Progress was extremely gradual and hard to notice which was discouraging at times, I documented it every day so on the especially hard days I could look at how different it was from the beginning or even after 3-4 days. While I was out of work I escaped to Nantucket and my parents house for a week and was able to unplug, rest and be around family, which was just what the dr. ordered. I was incredibly lucky to have such a wonderful support system both at home and at work, but I truly wouldn’t wish this on anyone.
dress / purse
I think the hardest part of this has been the uncertainty, it seems that the dr’s don’t know a lot about the disease, they do a ton of tests to rule out the worst case scenarios then throw some meds at you and basically tell you to wait it out. They are supportive but don’t have a lot of information to offer. I’ve found that my acupuncturist and chiropractor have been the most helpful for me and honestly credit my speedy recovery on the paralysis front to my acupuncturist!
linen shirt (more sizes in another one of my favorite linen shirts available here) / jeans
You might notice in my recent posts my face doesn’t look quite symmetrical, it’s because of the Bell’s Palsy and there’s really no telling how long it will take to get back to 100%. I’m back at work and slowly but surely feeling better, plus throwing myself full force into wedding planning, and hoping to get back to blogging on a more regular schedule soon! As always, thanks for sticking around and supporting me even when I go virtually radio silent on you guys. All of your messages checking in with me have gone so appreciated and I can’t wait to get back to regularly scheduled content!
